Welcome To The Philippines
by Anknown Unonymous
Summary: Felipe's an idiot and they all know it. But he has made THE worst decision in the entire history of bad decisions. What was he thinking? Sending his three brothers to World Meetings and facing their worst nightmares. I don't know why I even try... But anyways, it's Philippines, so welcome... anybody? At all?
1. Prologue

**Note: This is an experiment and my first fanfic.**

**Welcome to the Philippines!**

**Prologue**

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><p>Philippines: beautiful, <em>gorgeous <em>Philippines. A vast land where rice fields, mangoes and spices appear. A free land with traditional people who are loyal and faithful to each other; where everything is classical and kinds of species are found, and most of all, a land led by a man named Felipe.

Felipe's a very talented man - _not to mention a narcissistic bastard at most times_ - he ruled a nation of three different islands that were banded together by... _other islands_. The three -_obnoxious, war-loving, clumsy, drug-taking, and nerve-wrecking_- lands were not only the ones that made Philippines a whole country, but they were also his brothers. Felipe just had much more superiority than the others, that's why he ruled the land. However, that is not the main subject of this story.

After 333 years under Spain's custody - _not to mention World War 2 and the recent typhoon Yolanda and the troubling event with Hong Kong_ - Felipe has realized that he's getting weaker as the days go by and he's getting older - _and his economic and financial resources are slowly going down the drain due to the Pork Barrel scam_.

Felipe knew his country will one day fall again. Seeing his citizens' happy faces fall into the wrong hands again... he just couldn't afford that; especially his brothers - _**wait a minute!**_

Felipe slammed his fist on the Narra desk. "I know what I have to do!" He reached towards the black phone on his right side and dialled America's home phone. Sometimes, Felipe just wants to slap himself -_even with a situation like this, he still needed help from America_.

"Hello?" A drowsy voice answered from the other end of the line. Felipe mentally face-palmed; he totally forgot that his timeline was different from America's.

"Oh, hey, America! Sorry, for waking you up so late at night." He greeted.

"Oh, no, s'okay," the American paused for a yawn. "So, what financial help do you need this time?" He asked.

"Oh, it's not that, actually... I'm handling things quite well here." Felipe laughed awkwardly, indicating a lie.

"_Ooo_-kay... so, what exactly is this urgent situation that you **had **to call me at this hour?"

"Well... I actually have a favor to ask you..."

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><p>Emmanuel - <em>or Emman<em> - chugged another bottle of legal drinks and played LOL, while updating his blog. He really should be reading and learning _Noli Me Tangere_ or _El Filibusterismo_, but he was always distracted by those tantalizing objects that he was attached to.

Dark brown eyes partly hidden by glasses flickered, from his phone to his portable laptop laying on his... lap. Emman didn't care if his legs were burning up due to the overheating of the object - _it's sitting there and it's staying there_. He sipped from his Sprite and cranked up the volume of the game he was playing to ward off the _not-so-annoying-but-distracting_ sound of his brother, Esteban's - _or Basty's_ - guitar solo. Emman liked the sound of violence - _and violence itself_ - especially the times when he and Daniel - _or Danny_ - misunderstood and fought.

However, those were only playful fights, since there was a tight bond between them and he didn't want to get scolded by their kuya - _big brother _- Felipe. That **and **he also didn't want to wage war over the country again - _really, he's not being a wimp or anything but, God knows how strong Danny gets when he fights_. Danny almost broke his neck during one of his rage quits!

At the other side of the room, Basty was tuning his guitar, smoking what seemed to be a cigarette - _or eating a candy that looks like a cigarette_ - singing songs that were mostly harana's, and making his own songs. Regardless of his young appearance and height, he was actually the eldest of three brothers - _but not as old as Felipe_.

There are a few bruises found around his body and a bandaged on his right cheek because of the Yolanda incident - _his injuries haven't healed yet, along with a few other painful bruises on his back that were from the Spanish and Japanese wars and a lot of terrible traumas _- in other words: **storms and typhoons are not friends**.

Danny isn't the talkative _or _the happy-go-lucky type in the three - _that was reserved for Basty_ - he isn't the silent type either - _that was Emman_ - he's just the normal one in the trio. Danny had a knack in writing poems and stories in his native tongue, in English and in _Tagalog_; he is the _artistic _one.

His hair was strangely long, like France's but shaggier and darker; people often mistook him for a girl. Although Danny _occasionally _makes a mess of everything, he's also the one who offers peace for the sake of justice - _and not being grounded_. He's also quite talented in handling swords and has developed a soft spot for making food - _mostly desert_.

When the three islands heard the sound of Felipe's footsteps, they rushed to hide their... _shenanigan-ous_ items.

Emman saved his game and hid it under the bed, as well as his phone and earphones. Basty threw his cigarette out the window and sprayed himself with cologne - _he was ready_. Danny hid the pocket knife he was using to cut a piece of wood then went back to his artwork of Jose Rizal.

The three acted as if **nothing happened**.

The door swung open and their _kuya _entered their quiet heaven.

"Good news, everyone!" Their brother proclaimed, waving a piece of paper that had - what seemed like - America's handwriting...

**This is bad.**

"After a long time of thinking, I have finally decided," Felipe continued. The trio exchanged worried glances. Felipe and thinking are already bad omens on their own; mixing the two together... is a black cat walking under a ladder made of glass. "Due to some 'business' in Hawaii, the World's Conference will not have a representative from the Philippines - or simply, I will not be able to attend. So, I thought I would pick one of you to attend it."

The three resisted the urge to groan.

"However," Felipe began, again. "Since the three of you have already grown enough to not babied, I have decided to put all three of you in charge of the country while I'm gone-"

Their faces brightened up. _This could mean that they can do whatever they want! _Well, at least two of them could.

"-and I am putting the three of you in charge of attending the world conference."

Their faces fell, jaws dropping.

_Say, what?_

Felipe smiled deviously at his brothers. "The three of you can manage that without destroying our reputation, right?" He started to walk away, a huge grin dominating his lower face. "And by that, I mean: **no **smoking, **no **playing video games or technology, **no **proclaiming war, **no **flirting with _sensitive _countries, **no **sleeping after lunch, **no **sleeping **during **the meeting, and **no sleeping when war is proclaimed**. Emman, you take care of Basty and his wounds. Basty, you are responsible for your brothers' actions. And Danny... _I don't want you to flip when you see other countries and cause chaos_; I have enough financial problems, already."

Felipe disappeared behind the door... but poked his head back again a while later. "**P.S. You three are grounded**. Emman, I can see your laptop poking from under the bed. Basty, I can smell the smoke on you. Danny, I can see chopped wood on the floor. _I'll be leaving tonight; the meeting is in two days; be on your best behaviour~_"

They groaned as his form disappeared, then reappeared again. "-and also don't insult Russia."

The door slammed shut. When the coast was clear, they glanced at each other.

"We are so _screwed_." Emman said. Basty laid on his back and covered his face with his hat.

"Definitely _screwed_." Basty and Danny agreed.

Seriously, how can three boys - _who could barely take care of themselves_ - take care of a country and go to a conference filled with old people?

As human logic and first instinct suggests... let's find out.

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><p><strong>Trivias that might answer some or your questions:<strong>

~The Philippines is composed of 7,107 islands.

~I now realize that the Philippines relies on America quite a lot, so I concluded that the Philippines is one of the weakest countries I know so far.

~Mindanao is usually a violent land, but not that violent; it's a place where there's always a problem and 'wars'.

~_Harana _- a song through which a man expresses his feelings towards a woman.

~The Spaniards and Magellan first went to the Visayas first and made a commitment to one of the natives living in Cebu. That's why Basty is the eldest.

~The Philippines is composed of more or less than a hundred languages.

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><p><strong>Review, favorite and follow. Constructive criticism is advised, thank you.<strong>

**Beta'd by: Parallel Pairs**


	2. Chapter 1

_"Hey, Al, I can trust you, right?" _Felipe asked out of the blue_. _

_"What are you talking about, of course you can trust me!" _America said, taken aback and hurt at the same time.

_"Well, it's just that what I am about to ask you is highly confidential, and I don't want you to think that I'm flirting your daughter or anything like that. Seriously, I may be narcissistic but I'm not pedophile."_

_"What?! Nevermind, what did you want to talk about?"_

_"Well, I was thinking of putting my three idiotic brothers to a test. Since you know, I'm not handling the name of Philippines all too well," _the South-east Asian laughed nervously, scratching the back of his head.

_"Huh, what are you talking about? I think you're handling it all too well!" _America reassured his dear friend, obviously lying. He knew that the guy was as dependent as a child, he just didn't want to tell the truth cause he didn't want to bruise his ego and be all depressed again.

_"Seriously?" _Felipe deadpanned, knowing the lie.

_"Yeah...well, maybe not." _It was now America's turn to laugh nervously._ "But c'mon, stop being paranoid. You're growing and it's not that bad..."_

_"Yeah, I know but what'll happen once I'm, you know, gone? Obviously they're still weak and recovering; especially after Beatrice's [Borneo]* um..." _Felipe didn't even bother to continue. He already knew that Alfred knew what he was talking about.

There was a long pause before Alfred replied.

_"Fine, I'll be by at your house tomorrow. I'll fax you a letter and your ticket. Later." _He hung up_. _

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><p>"Okay, I'll get going now! Say 'hi' to Ukraine for me! Don't forget to brush your teeth! Be sure to keep a safe 20 feet away from France okay? Bye!" the bright-smiling physically 27-year-old man said with a grin as he walked to the front door. "Be sure to secure the house no matter what," he rambled on and on.<p>

He opened the door, but before he could exit, he turned around and looked at his brothers one last time, then he smiled. It was a worried one.

"Just... be careful in here and during the meeting okay?" he asked for the last time.

Basty let out a frustrated sigh and replied, "Yeah, yeah. Just go already, you're gonna miss your flight." Felipe smirked, knowing that what the boy was telling him that he's gonna miss him. Seriously, the small blush gave it all out. He tousled his hair as the two other siblings bid their farewells to him.

"Right," he said. "Can't make Hannah-dear [Hawaii] wait for me. Gora!**[Go+Tara(Let's go)]**" He picked up his luggage and practically zoomed to the small white limo.

And just like that, Felipe left unceremoniously, leaving the three really confused physically teenaged lands even more confused.

"I wonder what Kuya Felipe is doing that's so important that he has to go to Hawaii?" Danny asked, holding a plate of mango float. "I didn't see any letter about that he has any business at all in Hawaii."

Basty let out another frustrating sigh, taking a bite from his own plate of the delicious dessert. "He's just probably trying to flirt with Hawaii, how ironic," he said while munching. "What do you think, Em?"

The person spoken, just took a glance at him then turned back to the laptop screen. "The bastard's probably just trying to see a bunch of girls in bikinis. Like seriously, the guy needs a girl or something," he stated flatly, a bit slurry due to the beer he was drinking. He took another bottle of San Mig' and chugged it.

Basty sweat-dropped. "Well, whatever the case is, I hope it's worth wearing the goddamned thing he calls a 'barong' [Filipino suit]." He took a cigar and lit it. He took a brown box that was placed next to the sofa that Felipe left before leaving. He opened it making some dust dance in the air and sneezed as he took out a whitish-yellow transparent-like suit and black silk pants.

"Damn, am I really this short?" he questioned out loud.

Emman smirked. "I don't know, depends on what kind of 'short' you're talking about, eh, eh, eh?" He winked.

Basty glared at him, tempted to throw his slipper at him. "Oh, shut up, you damned hipster." He ignored his brother's complains and whines then began to look for other stuff in the box. "Here, it's yours and Danny's." He threw two other pairs of suits, one pearly white and another yellowish one with the same pants.

"Let's see what else is here."

"I wouldn't even be surprised if you find some 'unwanted things' there..." Emman muttered, taking another sip of his beverage.

"Ah-hah!"

"Hm, what you got there?" Danny asked, peeking over the eldest's shoulder.

"It's a... lace?"

"What's a lace doing in there?" Danny asked.

"Could it be...-" Basty's eyes widened at the piece of pearly white silk.

He shook his head. "Let's get dressed. We don't wanna be late now, do we?"

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><p>How he found himself in a huge twenty-foot limousine was a huge mystery to the three siblings. And what's worse, it belonged to a Western self-centered man who was addicted on being the world's greatest hero and owner of a lot of fast-food restaurants throughout. Yes, it was Alfred Jones aka, America.<p>

Though, he has helped the three kids ever since they were still kids, Emman, Basty and Danny still don't feel comfortable with him being under the same roof with them. Let alone in a tight space. Not to mention him visiting every time and causing havoc in the country and introducing people to whatever junk he possesses.

Well, the last one wasn't at all that bad...

Thankfully, the ride did not end as long as they had thought it would be. Another second of smelling the cheap car smell and Emman thought he'd barf along the car's carpetings.

They had arrived earlier at the designated area to where they'll be staying than most of the other countries, so the three siblings just sat at the lounge enjoying their last hour of freedom before the others arrive. Especially since Germany was around - the last and only time the meeting was held in their country, most of the Filipinos that he approached almost peed themselves.

They still wonder how the scary man can produce such delicious French Fries. And why it was called 'French' not 'German'.

Danny fidgeted in his seat, obvious that he was nervous of the outcome of meeting the other nations. His hand shook as he drew something in his sketch pad.

Basty kept tapping his foot on the floor whilst listening to the song in his iPod, looking frantically back and forth.

And Emman was... just being Emman. Sucked in his video game, just like always.

_I wonder what'll happen when the rest gets here... _he thought.

* * *

><p>Splash!<p>

"Ah! I greatly apologize!" A voice squeaked.

Basty peeked one eye open, finding himself staring face-to-face with a girl he has never seen before. A purple laced ribbon was found at the left side of her head - or was it the right?

The girl bowed several times as she apologized. He looked up, finding that his hair was soaked with some juice. "Uh, it's okay?"

"Liechtenstein! We'll be late!" Someone called her.

"Yes, coming!" the girl said, apologizing once more.

As she left, one thought appeared in Basty's mind.

_She reminds me of someone I used to know._

He shook his head. Probably nothing.

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><p><strong>Okay, before anything else, Basty and Liechtenstein shall not be paired... I think... Leave a comment. :D<strong>


	3. Chapter 2

**Hello everyone. Before anything else, I'd like to say thanks to the following people (or things) who favorited and followed:**

**Avelina Teuton**

**fleshslasher**

**StriclySatire**

**Madam Bakunawa **

**And of course, the very first reviewer and close bro of mine, Parallel Pairs.**

**Thanks again, bros! Keep reading!**

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><p>Welcome to the Philippines - Chapter 2<p>

"Once again, thank you for attending this flight! Enjoy your stay and aloha!"

Felipe exited the plane, being given flower necklaces and greeted by the Hawaiian maidens. Though he should be happy and relaxing, there was something in his mind that annoyed him ever since he left that morning. It wasn't that he forgot to tell America to spy on his brothers; no that wasn't that; or was it that he forgot to threaten France to kill him and barbecue him if he lays a finger on one of his brothers, specifically the innocent Danny? No, that wasn't it.

_Calm down, Felipe,_ he said mentally, _you're in Hannah's territory, you should be enjoying your stay. _

_Yeah, but still -_

_Whatever that thing you forgot, shouldn't be important. Now let's go to that five-star hotel Hannah was talking about!_

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><p>"Okay boys!" America came in, clapping his hands, eyes beaming. "Your rooms are prepared and checked in. You can go to them now!" The loud ruckus he made caused the three lands to wake up from their siesta.<p>

"Oh, thank God!" Emman sighed, closing the laptop he left open before sleeping. _One more minute,_ he thought, _and my ass might have been limped or worse - deformed._ Yes, narcissistic you may call him. Heaven knows how he slept without hurting his back. He stood up from the not-so-comfortable sofa of the lounge and grabbed his bag, but before anything else, he stopped and eyed at the blond American. "Wait, isn't there some kind of catch?" he questioned.

America laughed and scratched the back of his head, caught. He coughed and stuttered a few times before spitting out the truth. Basty and Danny stared blankly at them, their eyes still tired and drowsy, too tired to even understand what their brother and the wretched American were talking about.

America sighed. "Well, don't freak out or anything alright?" Emman raised an eyebrow, urging him to continue. "Um, I talked to the manager, who by the way is a close and personal friend of your brother, and said that she hadn't been notified that the three of you are staying here tonight and apparently all the rooms have been booked for the season. So after half an hour of arguing with her, she won, and we decided that uh, well..." he trailed off. "That the three of you should be sharing the rooms."

Emman sneezed. "Excuse me, could you please repeat that I don't think I quite get it." Which in fact was a lie. He couldn't believe what the hell he was hearing.

Felipe forgot to reserve them a room in a hotel.

He gritted his teeth.

The bastard.

The last time this practically happened was three months ago. When their boss was having a reunion in a large palace-like hotel in Cebu, Visayas where Felipe 'accidentally' left them at the mall that was next to it. And they had to walk through the rain in a damn traffic to get to the hotel, then realizing that Felipe had the card that can access through any room/elevator, they got sent to the Manager's room without any choice and their boss had to pay for their recklessness. It was humiliating.

And that wasn't the only thing Felipe caused due to his forgetfulness. There were a lot.

A vein popped in Emman's head. He didn't mean to outburst rudely. It was his habit. One of his brothers does something really messed up that he or they are responsible to clean up, then he decides to punch their lights out causing Danny to go 'War-Freak' again, which causes even more damage than before. As if having **the** most annoying brothers in the entire world wasn't bad enough. Seriously, they argue about practically anything they disagree on.

"Are you saying that Felipe, our big brother Felipe, forgot about us again?" he laughed darkly. Of course forgetfulness wasn't exactly the entire thing that Emman despised about his sibling. It was also the lack of respect and care he gives to them. Felipe was always locked up in his 'office' signing papers whenever either one of the lands wanted to do something with him. Ever since they were still kids. But now that they're teens, they don't care about it that much, but they do still want some attention from him.

"I don't know, I wouldn't actually kno -"

"That's it, the asshole's gonna die once I see him," he muttered, cutting the American off. Threat was visible in his eyes.

"Come on, Emm," Basty said, nervously, figuring that it was the best time to interrupt. His brother was scary at times like these, though he doesn't actually admit it. "Let's all be happy! It's not like it's the end of the world or something like that!" He put a hand and pet on his brother's shoulder, trying desperately to calm him down. Only to have him barked at and hit in the face. Real hard.

"OH, SHUT UP, YOU MOTHERFUCKING HIPPIE! I'S HAD ENOUGH O' YO SHIT" Oh great, now he's going gangsta.

Basty paled. He has been called many names a bunch of times but never... NEVER has he been called... a **hippie.** Sure he's happy. He's always happy! He loves nature... no matter how much he likes to pollute it... through smoking... weed... but still! He loves it as much as he loves his siblings - which is by the way less than zero degrees celsius. Ehem, anyway... Basty continued to pale as his brother ranted.

"My God! Emman, would you seriously shut the fuck up?!" Danny bursted out. "Seriously, you have some unexplainable brother issues! What you need is a therapist not a goddamned ophthalmologist! Thank God, Bathala, Allah and Sweet Mother Mary that you don't have one of those disgusting brother complexes! I've had enough crap already! Jesus." (Mindanao has a lot of religions...)

Before Emman can throw an insult back at him, Danny raised a fist and glared at him. It was at that moment that the tallest of them (it's Emman) snapped back. This definitely was not the best time or place to pick a fight. Especially since there are a lot of people around who's watching them (America included), and since the manager can easily ban them or worse, fine them, which was really bad since they're still broke.

Emman took a deep breath, then let it all out. Including his rage. "Okay, okay, fine." He turned his attention back to the American who was still standing, awestruck and a bit scared. "So... who are we sharing with? Rooms I mean. Obviously since you're not **that** rich, you probably called some of the other countries and told them about this. So, who did you call?" he asked.

The American whistled, pretending to be innocent and looked up at the ceiling trying so hard to avoid eye contact. He knew it would end up bad when he told them. Even Felipe told him that he should never mention the three names. Especially since he's been through that stage in his early life as well,"Oh, no one in particular that has definitely got NOTHING to do with your past lives, even though we all are now at peace."

"Mm-hmm?"

America sighed, "It's..."

* * *

><p><em>Dear Felipe,<em>

_Bro, your brothers as scary as hell. Please send help. AND a therapist._

_Alfred Jones._

The country laughed at the letter, then sneezed.

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><p>Basty woke up with a start. And the first thing he noticed was that he wasn't in his room, as cliche as it sounded. Was he even in his room before? He shook his head. That didn't matter now. All that mattered was that how he got here. <em>Wait,<em> he paused, _this isn't one of those movies where the character got drunk and banged a random girl or dude _(gender equality)_ from the streets right?_ He shook his head again of course that didn't happen. The last time he got high out of his mind was last week, and he didn't banged a person. But still, he checked his body, looking for anything; bite marks, being naked... he found none, to his relief.

But still, how did he get here?

Then a small memory of the early ruckus replayed in his head.

A small 'smile' crept on his broken face. He still couldn't believe what he heard. He just heard his younger brother call him a hippie. A HIPPIE. Of all things, why that? What has he ever called him? Besides a damned hipster.

Maybe he should stop ranting for now and return to figuring out where he was. He looked around the room. Gathering clues of any sorts. There were tomatoes at a corner of the room; a guitar at the sofa and some random pics of Romano when he was still a kid.

A shiver ran down his spine, thinking that he somehow ended up in a pedophile's room.

_Wait, tomatoes, guitar, pics of Romano? There can only be one guy..._

"Ah!"

Somebody had just jumped on him from behind.

"BASTYYYY, MI COMPADREEE!"

... Spain.

* * *

><p>"Can you give me a good reason why I am stuck with you?" Emman crossed his arms.<p>

"Because you're quiet," Alfred replied, "well, most of the time. And I like quiet! It makes me feel superior to it"

The other retorted, "Well, I like quiet too. That's why I'd rather be with Japan."

America pouted. "But you have a lot of video games in your laptop! I wanna be with Japan too but I made a solemn oath to Felipe that ."

Emman rolled his eyes. "Wow, you make promises? I did not know that. Anyways I'm pretty tired so I'll just head to the be - Alfred?"

"Yeah?"

"Why... is there only one bed?"

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><p><strong>Ahaha, cliffie. Sorry, I had to run short on this one. This did not go as planned so I am terribly sorry for the weirdness. Please, I do hope you leave a message at the reviews. When I get back, I expect at least five reviews. <strong>

**And since you guys are awesome:**

**"Are you saying that I am going to sleep on the same bed as you?"**

**"You have no choice."**

**Kudos!**

**Replies: **

**Madam Bakunawa: Thanks, I am honored!**

**Guest: I just did and hopefully will. ;)**

**Ronotaitsu: As did I, that's why I made it. ;) **

**Parallel Pairs: Say hi to your bro for me!**


	4. Chapter 3

**Yes! Finally, I am back from the dead! So sorry for not updating bros and bro-ettes or sis-s, wuh? Anyways! You have completed the tasks! Five/six/or more reviews. And thanks to you, the new followers and favors:**

**pokermaniac039**

**Roe D' Normandy**

**and NoIdea135!**

**Welcome to the family of Insane Filipinos, guys or gals (gender equality)! **

**Now, onward.**

**Warnings: signs of rape etc. and man tears.**

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><p>"Sorry, but nope!" the American turned his head away from the younger land, not lad.<p>

"Oh, come on. Al!" Emman whined, "I made a promise to Felipe that I'd take care of Basty's wounds!" A small head appeared beside him in the shape of Felipe's head and winked at him. The teen shook his head and waved it off.

"And since when do you keep promises?" Al retorted, pouting.

Emman raised a hand and opened his mouth to reply something smart but both faltered when none came to mind. Alfred "Fantabulous" Jones just smiled triumphantly at the guy as he sighed of frustration. "Look, I know I'm a geek and a nerd," he admitted. "But seriously man, when it comes to medical terms, I'm seriouser than serious."

Alfred just stared at the kid, eyeing him suspiciously. "This isn't because you don't wanna share a bed with me right?"

Ding ding ding! Bull's eye!

"Uh... duh?!" Emman simply stated. "I mean that has got to be _the_ gayest thing I have ever done or will do! That, and I meant most of what I said before."

"Oh, come on! It's not like we're gonna do _**that!" **_Alfred scoffed. "Look, I'll just sleep on the other side, and you on the other."

"I don't think that'll make me feel any better." Emman deadpanned. "Especially since I sleep with no shirt on and neither do you."

"Okay, then, you can just switch with the others, it's not like they don't have the same issue."

Emman gritted his teeth and cursed. This guy was giving him no choice at all. Guess who's sleeping on the floor...

On the other hand, the same thing is happening towards the other two. Spain however...

Basty shivered. He can't believe it. He just CAN'T believe it! He even refused to think about it! But he can't help it! He's gonna share a bed... with his worst nightmare. Spain. Antonio Fernandez Carriedo. The guy who enslaved them for the longest time in his entire history. The guy who tortured him and sold off his 'sister' Borneo to other countries.

It just had to be Spain.

I mean, why can't it be Japan? I mean, Japan is much more favorable since he gave them 'freedom'. At least just a little bit. And they're cool now.

Why? Why must be the world (*coughauthorcough*) so cruel to him? Sure he smokes, but at least, he was part of the people who took care of the world, being part of a nation and all!

But noooo, the world (*coughreaderscough*) just had to be so sadistic that he had to share it with the one he despised.

"Basty, mi amigo." Oh, speak of the devil. "You seem so tense. Is there something bothering you?"

Basty turned around, only to jump a foot in the air as his roommie was an inch away from his face.

Basty's face was tainted slightly pink. He was never one to socialize. Even if he was, he still wouldn't... eherm... how do I say this? Take advantage of the 'relationship'. Not that he actually HAD a real relationship. (Technically, the last time only lasted for a few weeks.) So... let's all just say that he's still 'innocent' after all those years just to fend off the awkwardness.

He continued to move further away on the - their- bed from his companion as he noticed that he was shirtless.

"W-w-why are you shirtless?!" he practically yelled.

Spain gave a confused face. "Well first, it's practically a hundred degrees outside kinda makes me wanna wonder how you continued to live here; second, is it not normal to take your shirt off in the Philippines?; third, the air conditioner's remote won't work and I just came from a bath," the Spaniard replied/explained.

"That doesn't give you the right to not tell me! Honestly, and you say that you were-are educated," Basty scoffed and crossed his arms. There was silence fora few moments as Spain eyed his practically-historically-based-son.

"Wait a minute." Spain lunged forward on the bed to examine his companion only to have him move backward and hit the wall.

"Basty, mi compadre," Spain whispered. Ai dios mio! This is turning out to be every fangirl's dream- I mean, eherm, ew, rape, yuck, bleck, gross!

"Are you meaning to tell me..."

Esteban winced.

"...that you're still virgin?"

Ding ding ding! Double bull's eye!

Basty almost wanted to cry right then and there. Nothing, and I mean, nothing can bruise a man's ego except being called a virgin. Really. Basty shut his eyes tight, preparing for the ultimate humiliation.

Instead, Spain pulled back and smiled down at him. He didn't smirk- but smile!

"That's okay, mi amigo," Spain said. "No need to cry. I won't tell anyone that you're still like... that."

This was the reason Basty hated Spain. No matter how much he tries, Spain always gets the better of him.

...

It was almost seven and still Japan was, admittedly, happy. And disappointed. But happy nonetheless.

He was happy because he had a roommate that can cook like him-maybe even better, but he was sad that he can't be with the guy that had a lot of video games and watched tons of anime. He was also told that Danny also watched anime but not that much.

Because he was the first to be told of the sudden change of plans, he immediately called room service to bring him another mattress since he knew half as much as the others that Filipinos are most likely to be bed hogs. No matter how Felipe denies it.

A small knock on the door alerted the Japanese man to walk up to there and open it. But only to be greeted by a messy mop of brown-ish black hair, looking for a bed to sleep.

"Where the hell's the bed?" the lad-supposedly Danny by the obvious resemblance of Felipe and his accent-slurred lightly, obviously sober. He entered the room-well, barged actually and collapsed on the bed.

"Are you sober?" Japan asked, "what exactly did you drink? And how much?"

"Nothing...just some...Emperador...a few shots..." Danny continued to slur, "I think."

Japan sighed. This was not the Danny he knew centuries back then.

Danny used to be so...tribal, until the short 2-year visit with Britain. That practically shut him up for a while. If he remembered quite correctly, it was probably because of England that Malaysia and him are always fighting. Other than that, he was a cute kid. But comparing him from back then and him today, it was quite a wonder really to why it was as different as a meter stick and a metal rod.

His appearance never changed though. Same messy hair and the brown-ish skin that probably paled over the years of being under his rule. The only thing different in the features were his growth spurt and the disgusting smell of alcohol on him. Jeez, where did the guy end up before stumbling in his room? At an hour like this?

As if reading his mind, Danny answered, "Found a bar a few floors below... should've been there... were a lot of girls... and wine..." Then he laughed like an idiot. If it was an anime, there'd practically be a drool coming from his mouth.

Well that explained a lot.

Japan sighed as he sat on the bed next to the other's.

Well, that was his hopes being crushed.

_I do hope his being sober ends before the meeting tomorrow. _

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><p><span><strong>Replies:<strong>

**Avelina Teuton: Yeah, sure, miss (I'm not sure if you are a miss but tell me if I am mistaken). I was just having an idea like that XD. Thanks! I have been thinking over this for quite a while.**

**Parallel Pairs: Really, it was that hilarious? And yes and no to your questions. XD**

**NoIdea135: You mind reader! How did you guess my thoughts for the next few chapters?! Are you psychic?! And yeah... Felipe is... kinda like France sometimes... yeah... **

**Roe D' Normandy: I have no words to describe how awesome you are to review even though you have no words to write. XD Hehe.**

**Guest: Maybe...**

**Strictly Satire: Calm down man! I just had an exam! Chill! XD**

**That's all! Wait no-**

**A/N: Again, hi guys! And I'm sorry if the setting, specifically the date and time is confusing. My mind is confusing and it tends to keep itself that way. I still haven't thought this through, so just... bear with me, okay? I'm having trouble squeezing updating this thing into my schedule. So until I update next time, just please wait. ^^**


	5. BONUS CHAPTER! FINALLY!

**BONUS CHAPTER!**

**So... I don't really know if this is too late but Felipe's name pronunciation is 'fel-LEEP'... or it depends on how you think it is pronounced. Anyway, sorry for the delay. You know, school's a drag sometimes. But hey! I updated didn't I?**

**Though this should have been the fourth chapter of this er... book, I think I'll just hand in a few of my drabbles in the story... you know, to make it much more lively than before. **

**Oh, before I forget...**

**Welcome to the family of insane weirdos, LassRonan0020! I do hope this story is much to your liking for we have a lot of seats vacant for new favors and followers, sad to say that there are only a few people who actually acknowledge this fic. *tongue click* yup... anywho... let the story commence!**

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><p>Title of drabble: <em>Saturday Mornings... ft. Basty de los Reyes. (AN: Before anything else, let me just insert my rage for this quite catchy song)_

He was furious.

He was angry.

He was mad.

He was... being licked all around his face by his brown Labrador dog, Palawan; his alarm clock singing Rude by Magic!, making his Saturday even suckier than it already is.

"Down, boy! Palawan, off!" He pried the dog off, trying so hard to make his voice calm to not scare his favorite (of the dozen more dogs he owned) Lab. As the dog did, his hand found its way to the alarm clock and bashed the top of the clock almost destroying the piece of technology that China or Taiwan or whoever made the cheap thing.

It wasn't because of the nightmare he had about Japan, China, America or anyone last night... it was because of the blasted song that kept ringing in his head, nonstop. It was everywhere; the streets, the plazas and playgrounds, hell, even in the bathroom! Sighing, he went downstairs as he heard Danny's sizzling pan.

The last thing he wanted was for someone to sing the damn song in front of him.

"Hey there, Basty!" America smiled holding a fork full of pancakes. Oh.

He forgot.

America was visiting...

...again...

...for the fifth time...

...after a thousand others...

"Out of my house," Basty replied, glaring at the blond man.

"What? I just got here!" America whined. "Besides, this isn't just 'yours'."

"Don't care, bahala na (leave it/I really don't care)! Out! No me importa!" Basty spat. He didn't like to speak the blasted tomato-man's language but it was a goddamned Saturday and it got ruined by a song. The worst scenario he ever thought.

"But...but..." America stuttered. "Why you gotta be so rude?"

Basty cringed.

"Don't you know I'm a nation too?"

A slipper made its way to America's mouth. Truth be told, he didn't actually sing it. But the drasted song in his head made it sound like he's singing it.

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><p>Title: <em>Chinito by Yeng Constantino... ft. Emman de los Reyes (I try my best to translate these... so don't judge!)<em>

"Wow, it's such a great pleasure to let me tour your place, Emman, aru!" China said as they walked through a garden near the mall. "It's really beautiful. It's been such a while since I came here."

"Glad you like it," Emman replied. He didn't really like the outside world - being an introvert and all - but every once in while, he enjoys a walk or two.

_Napapansin mo ba? (Have you noticed?)_

"Huh?" Emman's head whizzed to where the music was coming from until he saw a cafe that recently opened with large speakers. Typical. He closed his eyes and paid no attention to the music as they continued their walk/tour. The breeze was chilly as it was getting quite late.

_Kaya ang tulad ko... (So I like...)_

_Kahit nasa sulok lang nasa iyong mga mata (Even in just the corner of your eyes...)_

Emman abruptly stooped and pondered for a moment. This sounded familiar... Hmmm...

Listening...

Listening...

_...Kahit hindi naman ako ang iyong kaharap (Even though I'm not your opposite)_

_Oh chinito.._.

Emman's eyes widened at sudden realization of what or about what the song was as he saw two girls passing by them, looking at them and (shiver) giggling...

It was...

...Chinito...

The song about the girl who fell in love a chinese man.

Damn it.

He looked at the girls again as they kept swooning and giggling and other passersby were looking at them awkwardly that it actually makes it sound like they're... oh. _Oh._

He gets it now.

_At kung ikaw ang nakatawa (and if you're laughing.)_

_Ako pa ba ay nakikita (I'm still seeing...? What the hell google?! Sorry I'm not good at translating)_

_Nalilimutan ko and itsura ko... (I forget how I look.)_

Emman was pissed. I mean, really, with the song and only the two of them in a garden filled with beautiful flowers in the afternoon, China being a chinese girl-looking man obviously, and him... Emman... being a Filipino and admittedly a rather dashing man... who wouldn't think that... that...

_Kapag nausap na ikaw! (When I'm talking to you!)_

Oh, what does he do, what does he do?! he other nations and his brothers will probably smirk, sneer, chortle, laugh, snicker, etc and humiliate him! Especially his brother Danny, since he usually teases the younger that he looks like a girl and that he's gay and stuff. This can't be happening!

"Emman, aru," China said, "are you alright? You seem... red."

Emman flinched- He actually FLINCHED!

"U-uh, y-yeah! Psh, I'm fine! Peachy!" he stammered. He. Stammered. Great. Fantastic! Now those girls will probably think of something else! Relax Emman, relax, he told himself. "So, uhn...eherm, let's go back to the hotel shall we?" Facepalm. He just had to say hotel. Now **the rest of he world** will probably think of something else.

"Ah, yes. It is almost tea time. And it's getting quite late."

"Yeah, I'll catch up to you...I just need to get something I dropped earlier... You go ahead."

China smiled at him. "Ok, see you later then."

Emman stiffly smiled at his friend back and waved. Once his friend was safely back to the hotel which was just across the street, he turned to the two girls who immediately stop and freeze as they saw his horribly broken and scary admittedly face.

Now...

What's the best way to torment girls?

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><p><strong>SO I was about to add another drabble but I grew tired of typing... Anyways to know the trio better, I've decided that I'm gonna make some Character dares! It's basically like those ASK-thingies in creepypasta characters but in this, you can also dare any character in this story might it be original or Himaruya's. So... anyone up for the challenge? <strong>

**Replies:**

**Strictly Satire: Yes, begging does work. Quite efficiently too. XD Annnnd, yeah. I knew that, sorry won't happen again... And thank you! I try my best to make it funny XD**

**Roe D' Normandy: Your patient waiting-ness and will have finally been fulfilled (hehe it rhymed) young one. Write the next chapter, I shall now.**

**Madam Bakunawa: Yeah, I looove tormenting our home region, that's what makes it fun! XD **

**Avelina Teuton: Sorry, I thought you spelled the name wrong XD but no guy loves to read yaoi-most of them. Yeah, I did my research on thee. Sorry for making it weird but don't deny that you haven't stalked an accountant here before.**

**And that's all for now! Wait!**

**This is for you guys! An early Valentine's gift!: (BTW: these lines are probably not gonna be included in the chapter so don't expect a lot okay?)**

"Hey why is there a kid in the meeting room?" Germany asked as a child stared at the personifications in bewilderment, a pointer pointed at her face. It was a strange-looking child with brown hair and... bronze eyes? And it-she was wearing ruby-colored clothes.

Her eyes flickered from the tall man to a certain shaggy-haired Filipino, pointed at him at shouted in glee, "Tito Danny!"

Whoa-what?!

Danny looked surprised but replied smilingly, "Why hello there little girl who's probably my niece because she called my 'uncle'!" The girl skipped to her 'uncle' and hugged him like there was no tomorrow. All the while, leaving the other nations, preferably Basty and Emman, confused.

The bronze eyes flickered once more. "Papa Basty?"

"What?"

"Tatay Emman?"

Water was spit.

"WHAT?!"

Danny grinned. "Now who's gay, huh?" Emman freaked out.

"B-but h-he's m-my- what?" the tall one stammered.

Basty drew his head near the girl. "Hm, she seems familiar." He examined her. "Hm... ruby clothes... Ruby... clothes... Ruby... cl-wait- RUBY?!"

"Yes, Papa?"

Basty paled and froze. "...Ru...by..."

"Hey, isn't 'Ruby' your national name for that typhoon that happened after Haiyan?" Singapore asked. "The kid who wrecked your house?"

"Y-yes." Danny and Emman nodded.

"Yea... and whenever there's this kid..." Basty continued, face dark. "There's always...Yolanda..."

"Yola-who?"

"...typhoon... Haiyan..."

**Okay, so that's merely it! Catch ya later! XD Feel free to PM me if you'd like a drabble to be posted!**


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